4 Years, 3 Weeks & 6 Days into Daddyhood


Up and at ’em. 6am on the road. Caravans!! Due to having given Talise her usual hot milk for breakfast, but forgetting to give her any food until it was too late, the milk was promptly churned in the car (that is to say, churned in her belly in the car) and dispelled in the form of cottage cheese. Not especially pleasant having to twist round to the back of the car wiping sick/cottage cheese off her face + dress + the car seat with baby wipes, but at least she was considerate enough to avoid spewing over the bag of food or any other clothes or any other part of the car really apart from the floor mat. Nice accurate barfing, Talise!

Discovered our new Honda Civic has great aircon for recirculating the odour of vomitus into the exterior.

Got 3 big slices of cake at Kingsley Village.

Arrived at the youth hostel. After further cleaning of the child and the car, we had a spot of lunch, then met some rellies for a coffee at Portreath – specifically Papa Sully and Jo’s Nan. At Portreath beach, I did some sculpture and Talise collected stones in a bucket.

Tea with the rellies at the youth hostel, more food, showers etc, then the interesting process of “sleep”. That is to say, attempting to lie perfectly still on the creakiest, springiest bed ever, on pillows like clipboards (compared to the dual-layer super-comfy setup we have at home), while the residents on the upper floor sound like they are trying to break through the floorboards.

Somehow lapsed into unconsciousness for a few hours.


Breakfasted amidst the flies, played Scrabble with Talise, then skimmed stones on the sea at Portreath beach. Went to join forces with the Sully clan at Coverack, via a pasty pitstop at Porthleven. After a spot of extreme parking, decided it wasn’t worth risking life and limb and bodywork the “free” carpark, so settled for the Pay & Display, where we met the rest of the clan.

More beach! Dashing from the tiny waves, jumping up and down, Talise met a new friend, got her bum wet and said…

“I want to stay in the sea forever and ever!”

Looked around some gardens, then got back to the car before the continental shelf of dark grey cloud, which appeared out of nowhere like an alien mothership, shed its precipitous load.

Pizza + chips + ice cream at Roskilly’s, then onto St Austell Travelodge

… which was well sweaty! But not as sweaty as…


… The Rainforest Biome, which Talise zipped merrily around, followed by The Mediterranean Zone and other parts of The Eden Project. “It’s a maze!” she joyfully declared, as she dashed hither and yon through one of Cornwall’s premiere tourist attractions. We did, however, pause to make a den and eat Monster Munch – and point at potatoes.

Then onto our 3rd bed – the Hayle Travelodge – thankfully not as sweaty as its counterpart in St Austell.

Decided to treat ourselves to a meal out – specifically pasties in the carpark of Philps pasty shop.

Then back to the Travelodge, baths, a bit of TV, bed.


Day at the beach!

Well that was the plan.

As I write, it’s 1208h, grey and drizzly, but not as drizzly as it was. Let’s see what happens…

Well the drizzle didn’t let up. We went to see the church in Gunwalloe where we are getting married this time next year, where Talise saw a ‘Kipmobile’ on the adjoining golf course.

We then decided to go and have a look round the shops in Penzance, as it wasn’t a beachy kind of day. Penzance was a squib of great dampness, however, and it took us longer to leave the carpark than we spent in the town. Hey ho.

Back to Hayle and tea at Loggans Moor, the Brewers Fayre pub across the road from the Travelodge: 2 x fish & chips for a tenner and unlimited Diet Pepsi and milk! Good to have a proper sit-down meal for the first time since we arrived at Cornwall – and pretty nice too, despite the terrible reviews on t’Internet. And a soft play area attached to the restaurant, which was a bonus… (I never could have conceived of saying such a thing pre-parenthood)…

Before I conclude today’s entry, I just want to mention the wonderfully tasty sandwiches purchased from the Horse & Jockey at Porthleven.


Gave my phone a cup of tea this morning. It threw a bit of a wobbly for a little while, but seems fine now ( 1507h)…

*** quickly makes touching of wood motions ***

Day at the beach! No, really! Well, 3 hours. Though the sky was of grey aspect, many steadfast British holidaymakers arrived to do beachy things at Portreath beach. Including us. Trousers were rolled up, ice cream was consumed and much joy was to be had from digging, burying, paddling and sandcastling.

Then onto Porthleven, to visit Nanny, have an all day breakfast and destroy some flowers and practice ‘grumpy face’ by the harbour, and catch some late afternoon/early evening sun on the beach “with the different sand.”

Onto Talise’s cousin’s, where we were staying for the night. The small people were shy at first, but after a trampoline ice-breaker, much playing ensued till late into the night.


Smiled at the best company van ever on the way to Porthleven beach…

Damp Vader Ltd

“May the damp course be with you.”

Then more rolling up of trousers etc.

Had a final taste of ‘proper’ Cornwall on the way back to the car, by way of a pasty from the Horse & Jockey. I say ‘proper’ – it was cheese & veg flavour… but that’s my version of ‘proper’.

Our pemultimate day became what I reckon was the hottest day of our Cornwall hol, which was actually a tad too hot for me, hence our making the most of the unlimited soft drinks top-ups at Loggans Moor later – although for my first drink, of Apple Tango, it didn’t occur to me that the ice didn’t come in portions, but continued to fill your glass until you released the lever, so it wasn’t so much an Apple Tango with ice as a glass of ice with a hint fizzy appleness. Refreshing though – as were my further 2 glasses of Diet Pepsi (with ice (a sensible amount)).

Speaking of Loggans Moor (the Hayle Brewers Fayre pub), given that we were almost put off sampling its fine wares by the terrible internet reviews, I feel it is my duty to put the picture straight – or at least offer a more positive ‘review’ based on our experience. For 2 evenings in a row we took advantage of the 2 meals for £10 and 2 puddings for £2 offers, as well as the unlimited soft drinks top-ups (not sure what the latter cost, as I didn’t pay, but I’m sure it wasn’t expensive). Between us, then, we sampled the fish & chips, the chicken roll & salad and the cheese + onion quiche & chips. Also unlimited Diet Pepsi, Apple Tango and milk. Not extravagant fayre, by anyone’s reckoning, but perfectly adequate, tasty, inexpensive, in pleasant pub-like surrounds, with top-notch service. And a soft play area to boot, for those for whom such thing is a bonus. So if you ever find yourself in a position to consider popping into Loggans Moor, I would say… give it a try!

So the drinks are imbibed and Mummy’s having a bath in preparation for the long, early drive back to the Midlands tomorrow, while I observe the child soft-playing. Laterz…