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8 Years, 5 Months & 3 Weeks into Daddyhood

Following ‘The Real-ness of Santa’

I think it is possible that I now feel more sad about the loss of Santa than my daughter. I’ve been looking at some of my old blog entries (was it really 16 months between the latest entry and the one before?) – and I am reminded that, even before Talise was born, my hopes, in part, for becoming a parent were for it to rejuvenate feelings of mystery and magic. Santa (or at least my daughter’s belief in Santa) accomplished this. And his elves and reindeer, the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny and other such things. All of these things are now on the path to drifting out of the sphere of belief. So now what?

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8 Years, 5 Months, 2 Weeks & 6 days into Daddyhood

After repeated pertinent questions pertaining thereto, Mummy and I reluctantly bit the festive bullet yesterday and broke the news about Santa. I followed up with this letter, hoping to explain things further:

‘Dear Talise,

You’re such a beautiful, special girl, who Mummy and Daddy love so much, that we had to think really hard to answer your question about whether Santa is real. The truth is that he does exist, but not in the way you first thought.

As you get older, you realise that the truth is complicated, about all sorts of things, so your parents and teachers have to think of better answers to questions like…

“How did the Universe begin?”

“How are babies made?”

And…

“Is Santa real?”

The truth will never stop getting complicated, even when you are all grown up (especially when you are all grown up!), and we hope you will never stop asking difficult questions!

But back to Santa…

It is true that Mummy and Daddy spent hours thinking about what presents to buy you, bought you them, wrapped them and put them under the tree, along with those bought for you by all the other people who love you. We do this for you, as our parents did for us, and as their parents did for them, as their parents did for them, etc, etc, etc.

I imagine you will some day do this for your children, and I know you will love seeing them wake up too early (😜) on Christmas morning, run into the living room and sit eagerly by the tree, their small faces lit with Christmas lights.

And on this special day, and at this special time of the year, you will be their Santa.

As your Mummy and Daddy have been and will always be your Santa, and as our parents were our Santa, and so on and so on.

Because Santa is something so much more special than what you first thought. He is not a bearded, “chunky” man, who rides a sleigh pulled by flying reindeer, delivering presents to children on Christmas Eve… He is all the parents, all over the world and for all time, who love their children and want with all their hearts to give their children a beautiful, joyful and magical Christmas.

Santa is bigger than any one person, and his work has gone on longer than any of us have lived. He teaches us (children and grown-ups) how to believe in something we can’t see or touch. As you grow up, Talise, there will always be things you need to believe in – yourself, your friends, your talents, your family… and love ❤️. Santa – all the Santas in the world, for all time – has helped to give you that ability to believe.

And now, as you grow up and eventually become Santa to your own children and everyone you love and come to love… Mummy and Daddy wish you happiness, love and a wonderful, never-ending curiosity to seek answers to the BIG QUESTIONS.

Merry Christmas, beautiful girl.

Now and forever.

Oodles and oodles of love…

From your real Santas…

Mummy & Daddy
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx’

The above was inspired by this:

The Sweetest Way to Tell Your Kids the Truth About Santa

See also…

The Real-ness of Santa pt2

7 Years, 1 Month & 2 Weeks into Daddyhood

More! Herewith…

   
    
    
   

7 Years, 1 Month & 1 Week into Daddyhood

Following my latest entry…

https://theprogenitor.wordpress.com/2015/08/20/nature-mandalas-nests-hexagons-42-ness/

… and inspired by this six year old blog post…

https://flandrumhill.wordpress.com/2009/10/13/autumn-mandalas/

… my daughter was inspired to create these ‘nature mandalas’:

   
    
 
… and I to create this little bead mandala:

  
… and T’s more wild and free version:

  
Thank you once again, Amy-Lynn/flandrumhill, for your inspiration! 😊

7 Years, 1 Month & 4 Days into Daddyhood

My daughter has recently been ‘compelled’ to create what she calls ‘nests’ –

nest 1 – 30th May 2015

nest 2 – 28th July 2015

… which is quite a Zen-like, paganly spiritual activity in itself.

But then only yesterday someone commented on a six-year-old blog post I was following, in which the  author describes creating nature mandalas –

https://flandrumhill.wordpress.com/2009/10/13/autumn-mandalas/

I have been thinking a lot about the number 42, bees and hexagons.

It all seems significant…

6 Years, 3 Weeks & 6 Days into Daddyhood

I have my doubts about the educational value of some children’s TV programmes that purport to be educational – or have an educational element. Examples are thus…

Dinosaur Train – where carnivores wander pleasantly around their environment, eating convenient piles of carrion that just happen to be lying around.

Doc McStuffins – where you may be nervous about going to see the doctor, but there’s really nothing to be scared of… nothing actually hurts… and “it will only tickle a little”!

Mike the Knight, Sheriff Callie’s Wild West and most other young children’s TV programmes – where if you go around making mistakes and being selfish and stupid and self-possessed, everything will be alright and you will be completely forgiven as long as you recognise your mistakes and say sorry (even if you’ve nearly killed your friends by deciding to have a go at driving a train by yourself – and such!).

I understand the educational philosophy, which parallels the human accumulation of knowledge, whereby we teach our kids partially true generalisations, then, when we feel they are ready, revise the more complex and sophisticated details… but how useful is it, really, to completely misrepresent the reality of pain, death, consequences, and difficult emotions and relationships?

5 Years, 10 Months & 3 Days into Daddyhood

image

I try not to get irritated by children’s TV programmes these days. They are what they are and they do what they do, normally in the best way they can. And then there’s the Doc.

It’s okay if you giggle,
This will only tickle a little.

(from the song, Time For Your Check-Up.)

I know the whole premise is to teach kids to be caring, nurturing, to look after their health and not be afraid of going to see the doctor… but sometimes seeing the doctor hurts! Having treatment hurts, stitches hurt, needles hurt and medicine can be damned awful. Doc McStuffins wants her patients (her toys) to believe all their fears are unfounded – which they generally are, what with them being toys and all, and toys not feeling pain – but what kind of useful message is this sending to our real, human children?

“See, Lambie thought her stitches would hurt, but they didn’t and now she’s all better.”

“But Mummy, do real stitches hurt?”

“Erm…”

Of course we don’t want the kids to be to be terrified of going to the doctor’s, but should we lie to them to achieve this? This may work on their first visit…

“Do real needles hurt?”

“No, darling.”

(Later…)

“Mummy, it hu-u-u-u-urts!”

“Yes, but…”

“You lied to me! I’m never going to the doctor’s again!”

See my point?

5 Years, 7 Months & 5 Days into Daddyhood

Proud Daddy Moment 1

She chose Alice in Wonderland from the library, got home and fluently read the first chapter. She has her parents’ love of reading… 🙂

alice in wonderland qed adap ronne randall illus robert dunn

Proud Daddy Moment 2

She calmly persisted on a tricky bit of Lego Star Wars until she finally cracked it… 🙂

lego star wars comp saga ep 2 ch 3 droid factory tricky bit

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2013 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A New York City subway train holds 1,200 people. This blog was viewed about 5,700 times in 2013. If it were a NYC subway train, it would take about 5 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

5 Years, 3 Months & 2 Weeks into Daddyhood

miley cyrus wrecking ball

The other day my daughter and I saw Miley Cyrus’ Wrecking Ball video for the first time. Yes the original version, with nakedness and everything. I saw the nakedness, my daughter saw the nakedness, but her comments on the song/video centered around how sad it made her feel. My beautiful little empathetic daughter!

I don’t claim to know anything about what Miley has been through, but the uncomfortably vulnerable exposure of her body in the Wrecking Ball video and the emotionally exposing lyrics to this song left me feeling pretty sad for her – especially as mine and my daughter’s experience of Miley thus far has been as the bright and optimistic Hannah Montana.

Would I like to see the return of Hannah Montana? For my daughter’s sake, that would be nice. Would I like to think that Miley can be happy? That would be a hopeful start…

hannah montana pink red

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